today i am thinking about friendship and obligation. and how friendship changes and how it can quickly disappear without even realising it. i had this friend who i met about 6 years ago, and when we hung out we had a fantastic time. we had all of these things in common and could just talk and talk for hours about everything from music, movies to philosophy, religion and politics.
this person starting dating another person (and let me stop you right there- this isn't a typical story of the boy/girlfriend coming in between two friends) and since then this person and i spent less time together. this was understandable. i also started grad school and got really busy and didn't see most of my friends. however, the next few times we hung out, it wasn't the same. when they were with their significant other, it really wasn't the same. without the significant other, it was better, but still not the same. now, mind you, i really did like this significant other, but the dynamic just really changed.
a couple years have gone by, and everytime i see my friend it just isn't fun anymore. it's never what it used to be. maybe this is just the way the friendship has evolved. but i don't want to be obligated to go to functions that are really impersonal and boring. and full of booze. are we even really friends anymore if this is the only way we see each other every 6 months in these impersonal situations? i'm not so sure. seems superficial and part of me thinks i just don't have time for this shit.
on the other hand, my "kind of people" are very rare for me to find. maybe i should step it up and make the effort. can't decide.